Children Need Relationships with Both Divorced Parents

 Posted on July 13, 2018 in Child Custody / Allocation of Parental Responsibilities

Determining the allocation of parental responsibilities can feel like a competition between parents to see who can receive more parental powers after a divorce. Parents will present their own strengths and the other parent’s weaknesses, with the prize being a greater share of parenting time. However, a focus on winning parental control may ignore what is in the best interest of a child. A parent with a majority of the parental responsibilities should help the other parent maintain a strong relationship with their children.

Parental Roles

Illinois family courts presume that it is in a child’s best interest to have two strong parental figures unless one of those parents is demonstratively harmful to the child. Children benefit from an active relationship with both parents because:

• Each parent is a role model to the type of person that his or her child becomes;
• Parents have individual strengths in raising and teaching children;
• Parents can most effectively meet their children’s needs by sharing responsibilities;
• The absence of a parent may cause the children to feel abandoned; and
• A parent is a connection to the children’s relatives on that side of the family.

Fostering a Relationship

After a contentious battle for the allocation of parental responsibilities, it is natural to feel that one side won and the other lost. However, each parent has an equal duty to maintain a strong relationship with his or her children. The parent who received fewer responsibilities is at a disadvantage because he or she has less time with the children. The parent with a majority of the responsibilities can help the other parent foster a strong relationship with their children by:

• Encouraging the children to stay in contact with the other parent;
• Respecting the other parent’s scheduled time with the children;
• Being flexible with parenting time when appropriate;
• Giving the other parent a right of first refusal when in need of childcare;
• Acting politely when communicating with the other parent; and
• Never disparaging the other parent in front of the children.

Children’s Best Interest

Though parents are presumed to have equal rights during a divorce, Illinois courts also presume that it is least disruptive to the children for one parent to have a majority of the parenting time. A DuPage County divorce attorney at Calabrese Associates, P.C., can help you present why it is in the best interest of your children for you to have a majority of the allocation of parental responsibilities. Schedule a consultation by calling 630-393-3111.

Source:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/bringing-compassion-matrimonial-law/201807/fostering-the-child-non-custodial-parent